Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Value Yourself

Sometimes in life things have to go to a complete meltdown to realize something we should have before it went downhill.

I recently came out of a situation in which my past came back and gave me a harsh reality check. I went through a series of emotions throughout all of this, but I think I have found the place in which it's time to get back on track with where I am heading.

I have been living in a bubble of positivity over the last few months, this positivity has introduced me to awesome material, and even better people. I thought for a while nothing could stop this high, I thought that what I had left behind would never get back into my life, but life is sometimes unpredictable and will test you every once in a while.

Through this period I saw the me  I  believed didn't exist any longer, and I wasn't pleased with this in one bit.  I realize now that if I need to grow I can't rely on the past to help me do that. I became so joyful in what has happened in my life in the last few months, reflecting now it was somewhat misguided to believe I could change everyone's perspective as well.

Looking forward I am more comfortable with who I am now, and cannot allow anyone or anything to change that. I have made a peace with myself and that peace can only be upheld if I live up to it. I got sidelined on the things that have brought me enjoyment and inspiration over these last few months, and tried to fix something I really could not, this wasn't a good plan and brought me to the brink of self destruction.

This whole situation has altered my perception on a few things I was doing in my personal life. I was doing things that brought temporary pleasure, but not anything of worth. I realize now to continue on my path of growth its time to seek out that substance I am looking for. I don't know where it is exactly but I will search in the places I've overlooked, things I have overlooked.  Perhaps its no place at all, maybe its time to just be more secure with myself. I will figure it out as I go, but I realize now it's where I must go in life.

I could sit here and be negative about everything, but truly that's not who I am or want to be. I have now found peace in what will always be my past life, and find satisfaction in what will become my life looking forward.

Tomorrow is always a new day, new opportunities, new inspirations, new ways of living. To the NEW ....I look forward to meeting you !

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